I'm going to Otakon, and I'm going as a member of the press.

Some of you may recall some forewarning of this, and regular readers may even recall prior ventures in this direction.

To celebrate, have a partially-cleaned Advent Cirno pic.  Brimming with confidence and rough around the edges, it's the perfect statement of youthful vitality.

Also, if you're going, PLEASE let me know!  I'm looking for people to meet and interview.
 

I set off a metal detector today.

Flipguy asserts that one should have one's life on track when getting into a relationship.

I don't really agree.

More specifically, I don't think that having your life on track is the point.  Whether your life is on track or not is the result of factors both internal and external.  But relationship readiness is purely an internal thing.  Someone could have really lousy life circumstances, resulting in not being "on track," but be entirely ready for a relationship. Someone's life could be on track, but they might not be ready for a relationship.  Of course, if they're not on track, they might not have time or energy to pursue a relationship, but the same goes for when people are on track and just at tough times in their careers.

What would I say is necessary?

- Knowing who you are. (I mean really knowing.)
- Knowing what you want.

That's more or less it, though I've given more specific advice elsewhere.  Flipguy's advice appears to be good to many because generally, someone who knows who they are and what they want will be successful in life, and it's really hard to be successful without knowing those things either. But I'd say he's going off symptoms rather than root causes.

Behold, the nobility of man.

If the sword is cracked, reforge it.

If the edge has dulled, sharpen it.

If there is rust, clean it.

The world is not getting any younger.

Kestryl has a story of what she likes to call gross stupidity.  I'd call it romantic idealism taken to an unhealthy degree.  Call it what you will, it brought up something interesting.

If a girl was raped, most of us wouldn't blame her.  We abhor blaming the victim.  The point is that she had no power to defend herself and was taken against her will.  But if a guy is duped into having sex ("cyber-sex" in this case) we think it's hilarious.  Both men and women will laugh at him.  Heck, I've even seen webcomics about it.

What exactly is the difference between the woman's inability to defend herself from physical assailants and the man's inability to defend himself from mental assailants?  Why is the first one tragic and the second one hilarious? 

Continue reading →

You know what?

Hang all the political maneuvering, the rush to not be misunderstood, the fear of condemnation.

I will do this because it's the right thing to do.

http://www.mediavr.com/flash/infinityroom1flash.htm

Pride often rubs people the wrong way.

[20:19] moritheil: [Someone] is really very smart.
[20:20] moritheil: So, I think [Someone] actually is special.
[20:20] moritheil: But, [Someone] refuses to believe it, and . . . I don't know. [Someone]'s afraid of it being true.
[20:20] moritheil: Because - if that were true - that would mean that a lot of bad stuff happened in [Someone]'s life or to those around [Someone] or to the world - because [Someone] allowed it to happen.
[20:20] moritheil: Because [Someone] didn't stand up and claim [Someone]'s birthright, and didn't arm [themself] against those things.
[20:21] moritheil: So, as a means of not being saddled with this guilt, [Someone] chooses not to believe in [themself] as someone far above normal potential.
[20:21] moritheil: That's how I read [Someone], anyway.
[20:21] SarethIII: Which is another form of denial or avoidance.
[20:21] SarethIII: Set your expectations artificially low.
[20:21] moritheil: I think a lot of psychologists use that, too.
[20:22] moritheil: If expectations are low, complaining stops, and everyone is "happy."
[20:22] moritheil: Except for the quiet feeling that things aren't supposed to be like this . . .
[20:22] SarethIII: Yeah. It's not the real or long term solution to anything.
[20:22] SarethIII: It's a form of resignation.
[20:23] moritheil: I wonder why they don't teach the "die trying" ethic any more?
[20:23] SarethIII: that would require a basis for heroism.
[20:24] moritheil: I think a bias towards heroism is a wonderful thing.
[20:24] moritheil: Provided that it is flexible enough to recognize inobvious heroism.
[20:24] SarethIII: and well, there aren't any compelling public philosophies anymore that lead people to heroism
[20:24] SarethIII: except maybe patriotism, but only among certain classes now it seems
[20:24] SarethIII: In Iran, where you have a robust martyrdom culture
[20:24] SarethIII: you have all these people putting their lives on the line in opposition to the government
[20:25] SarethIII: Our society is very self-absorbed.
[20:26] SarethIII: Heroism requires a general admiration of people who regularly put themselves aside.
[20:26] SarethIII: It occasionally happens in extreme situations, like on 9/11
[20:26] SarethIII: where people lionized firefighters and such
[20:26] SarethIII: but that's not "normal life" under the circumstances we're in now.
[20:26] moritheil: It's true, but - I dislike blaming society.
[20:26] moritheil: I like to think of it in terms of choice.